I felt the small tiny lump and I chose to ignore it. I don't know why I felt it would just go away. But my body was telling me to get a physical in July of 2012. I walk into the doctor's office knowing she will find it. She jumped and asked why I had not mentioned it and of course I was in denial big time, which was my response.
On to the mammogram and ultrasound.
On to the Breast Specialist. Who of course wanted to do surgery right away. Petrified I feel I literally ran from her office and told her I would call her. Like I was showing her something. I did not call.
It is now November, I am headed to LA, CA to meet my niece Tuesday. But it is gnawing at me, my sadness is what I have decided to call it. I felt it had grown a little, ever so slightly, but it had grown. I just had a feeling what it was all about and taking the long train ride to and from the west coast gave me a very long time to make that long list of what ifs.
Upon returning returning home I immediately call the Breast Specialist and I was informed nothing was available until January and I said 'ok' very meekly. Less than two hours later the office called back and well let's just say the ball was rolling.
On December 10 my sadness was removed. On December 17 my sadness was termed malignant. On December 31, yes New Year's Eve, I had lymph node surgery. 16 nodes were removed, 8 of them contained sadness.
Well here we go. HAPPY NEW YEAR 2013! Thank you Lord for leading me to an awesome and outstanding breast specialist.
I am loving the word, "sadness" as opposed to "c." :-) Well, since I have read all your posts from end to beginning, I can only say that I'm SO happy you are sharing your journey with us. I will be a steadfast, encouraging, prayerful, cheerleader, as always. Love you, sis.
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